Sharing Common Ground: Observations at a Park

The American author, speaker and leadership expert, John Maxwell, said the following about communication. “If I had to pick the first rule of communication, the one practice above all others that opens the door to connecting with others, it would be to look for common ground. Too often people see communication as the process of transmitting massive amounts of information to other people. But that’s the wrong picture. Communication is a journey. The more that people have in common, the better the chance that they can take that journey together.” What does that have to do with an afternoon in a park? Quite a lot, as I discovered one Saturday while on a business trip in the Atlanta metropolitan area. I had some free time, so I grabbed a book and headed into the old town of Norcross, Georgia and wandered into Lillian Webb Park. The sign at the entrance described Ms. Webb’s civic engagement and her commitment to the local, state, and national groups in which she had participated. Because of her civic endeavors the City of Norcross created a delightful space for the local community and visitors to enjoy. As you enter the park you are greeted by a stone-based pool with a traditional three-tier tower fountain cast in a glossy black. The bubbling apex of water flows down into a top basin, then into the middle basin, and finally cascades down into the pool. The movement of the water was mesmerizing and the sound it made was calming. I found one of the eight metal benches placed around the fountain and shaded by trees and there I staked my claim to a comfortable repose. Birds chirped their joyful sounds and the clouds whisked by, cooling the ground below with shade. On this pleasant day the wind blew softly moving the three flags hoisted on stately poles behind the fountain that displayed their emblems and colors for all to see. The City of Norcross, the State of Georgia, and the United States of America flags all danced in unison. It was heartening to see a place where they were proudly displayed in a public setting. As I read, I noticed people of many backgrounds entering the park to take photographs in front of the fountain. One family, dressed in traditional African attire, posed proudly as a photographer captured images to share with relatives back home. Later, a limousine arrived, and a young woman stepped out in a pink Cinderella-style ball gown adorned with white lace, a silver tiara resting on her head. She was accompanied by eight young men in coordinated attire wearing pink shirts, brown vests, cowboy hats, and boots, all gathered for her quinceañera celebration. Over several hours, I watched dozens of people speaking different languages, all drawn to the same place, the same fountain at the same moment. I constantly looked up from my book to smile and say “hello” to the people walking by. Was it the beautiful day that brought them here? Was it the tranquil setting of the fountain? Was it the safety and cleanliness of the park that attracted them? Was it our shared humanity? Perhaps it was all the above. I thought how refreshing it was that there still exist places that people can share without protests, strife, or mischief and enjoy a public setting. It seems to me that people have so much more in common than the talking heads in the media will admit. People want many of the same things, we just have differences in how to acquire those things. One way I have found to bridge those differences is through stories that make a point to persuade people to consider a different way of looking at things. There is an old fable of the Wolf and the House Dog. A starving wolf met a well-fed house dog and envied his easy life. The dog said the wolf could live the same way by serving humans. As they walked, the wolf noticed a worn spot on the dog’s neck and learned it was from a chain. Realizing the dog wasn’t free, the wolf chose hunger over captivity and ran back to the woods. The lesson here is freedom is more valuable than what divides us. If we fail to find what unites us in those common things we may find ourselves in the chains of comfort. Like the wolf in the story, it is better to be hungry than to have security and be a slave. A fountain in a local park can be a place that draws people together. John Adams once wrote to his wife Abigail, “A Constitution of Government once changed from Freedom, can never be restored. Liberty once lost is lost forever.” His warning underscores the importance of vigilance, but also of unity. Consider the following. If you want to preserve what matters most, you must actively seek common ground. You must listen as much as you speak, persuade with humility, and remain open to understanding. Not every divide can be bridged, but where opportunity exists, it is worth the effort. Often, the most fertile common ground is not found in civic institutions or public debates, but within our own minds where understanding begins. https://kimmonson.com/featured_articles/sharing-common-ground-observations-at-a-park/?tvci=L5NAf_s5wPIZWo8-ocQKte90wJbLZK2rhu1Syx_OO9Q!